Prague: A Series of F*ckups

by | Aug 17, 2014 | Europe | 10 comments

Let me first say that Prague is awesome. But my first experience with it was a little nutty. I actually don’t want to relay what happened there – it’s not that interesting, to be honest. But it was weird and I’d like to un-remember a chunk of it.


I know, that title was misleading, wasn’t it? You were hoping for a post about how I fucked up my trip to Prague, weren’t you? First of all, that makes you kind of a jerk, you know that, right? Second, it was a marketing experiment – I’m betting record page views, based on that title. Third, I actually am a little sorry to have mislead you. Please keep reading.


Here is what I want to tell you about Prague:

If you go there, to Prague, and you get off the train and instantly freak out about the language cuz it sounds totally insane to you, and then a bunch of other fucked up things happen and you start to think “Prague sucks I wanna go home,” STOP WHINING. Prague doesn’t suck, you do. Shut your dumb face and stop being a baby. Prague is awesome.

It has this:

And this:


And these guys, WTF:

You can look at this naked-lego-lady statue:

And walk down this fucking beautiful street:

And wander through this graveyard.

And sit on the river and stare at this insanity:

You can take a thousand pictures of a thousand beautiful things, and forget to put your memory card in your camera for half of them, and not even be mad about it because you had such a glorious time in this city.

And then you can buy yourself this little cookie because you deserve it for changing your shitty attitude about Prague.

But that’s not all you can do there.


You can also realize you want to be married again someday, and that you want exactly two kids who maybe speak French.

You can do all of these things, in Prague.

Or you can be a jerk and sit in your hostel and complain about how much you hate Prague. Up to you.

A thousand puppies will live forever if you share this post, I totally swear.

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A thousand puppies will live forever if you share this post, I totally swear.


  1. Haiku Mistress

    do NOT sleep overnight in the park by that river bridge- even if hidden under a very nice and comfortable tree that creates a private little space just for you. no matter how romantic it might seem to you at the time. it is a bad idea.

    • Kelly

      Noted. Thanks for the tip, Cales.

    • Kelly


  2. Lynn

    I am a BIG fan of your blog. The hugest fan. However, you have a potty mouth in Europe. Which may be why I love the blog…I can’t decide.

    • Kelly

      I’m trying to prove to my parents that I’m an adult.

    • Sarah Moore

      Love the pics. Are you going to visit Edinburgh this trip?

    • Kelly

      I WISH. I fear I’ll have to wait till my next trip. 🙁

  3. Sarah Moore

    Drats…then again look at your theater Group performing at The Fringe and stay for a while.

  4. Chabs

    love love love prague!!!!


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